


Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Filk, M/M, None - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 08:03:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/795796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a song!  It's a scene!  "Matchmaker, Matchmaker OR "Be Careful What You Wish For--You Might Get It</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide

## Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide

by Jantique

DISCLAIMER: Pet Fly having abandoned them, Jim and Blair, like Lincoln, now belong to the ages.   


I'd like to thank Boch and Harnick, who wrote the beloved "Fiddler on the Roof".   


PRE-"Switchman -- in other words, set before the TV episodes begin.   


* * *

**SPIRIT GUIDE, SPIRIT GUIDE**

by Jantique 

Mostly sung to the tune of "Matchmaker, Matchmaker" from "Fiddler on the Roof". 

SCENE: Someone's living room, cheaply yet tastelessly furnished in Early Packing Crate, low-slung chairs, uncomfortable yet impossible to get out of, and retro lava lamp. 

PRESENT: BLAIR SANDBURG, and anonymous MALE and FEMALE Graduate Students. 

. 

BLAIR: "I had a vision of my Spirit Guide last night. Oh, man, you should have seen it! A wolf, only kinda blue." 

MALE (skeptically): "Yeah, what'd he do? Bite your ass?" 

BLAIR (defensively): "I only saw him for a minute--a couple of seconds, really. Then something woke me up. But he'll come again, I can feel it. I think he's trying to tell me something." 

MALE: "Ooh! How to find your Sen-ti-nel?" 

FEMALE: "Blair, you don't really believe in that, do you?" 

BLAIR: "Why not? And yeah, maybe he will! Hey, it's MY vision!" 

. 

*(to the tune of "Matchmaker, Matchmaker")* 

**BLAIR:**  
"Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide, make me a Guide. Bring me a Sentinel to stand beside.  
I can teach him to how smell, hear and see, And he'll put his trust in me. 

Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide, part the dark veil. I need to find my Holy Grail.  
This is my diss for I'm longing to be  
Blair Sandburg , Ph. D. 

For Rainier, make him a scholar,  
For Naomi, make him easy to please.  
For me, well, I wouldn't holler   
If he wants to worship me on his knees. 

Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide, I'm no Boston Brahmin, But I know I could be a good Shaman.  
Night after night in the dark I'm alone, So find me a Sentinel of my own." 

. 

FEMALE: "Blair, honestly, you're hopeless! You act like there are hundreds of Sentinels in the world, living throwbacks to pre-civilization -- and _you_ get to pick the perfect one!" 

BLAIR: "Why not? Why shouldn't I want the best?" 

FEMALE: "Because you're a boy from a poor family, with no psychic powers and no family connections. So whatever your Spirit Guide brings, you'll take! Right? Of course, right!" 

**FEMALE:**  
"Blair! I've found him! He's living in Peru. He's handsome, he's tall -- all right, he's five-foot-two. He smells funny, but he sees well. True? True! He's deep in the rain forest, alone since his Shaman died. I know you like warm weather -- go be his Guide!" 

**MALE:**  
"Sandburg! I've got her! A nearly-perfect 8! She's gorgeous! She's smart! (She's Evil Incarnate.) But she's a Sentinel, you're a Shaman, great? Great! You'll teach her how to use dials,  
The noise and lights to dim.  
She'll teach you how to scuba --  
Oh, can you swim?" 

BOTH: "Did you think you'd get a prince?" 

BLAIR: "Well, I do the best I can." 

BOTH: "With no powers, no money, you're only the sidekick -- be glad you got a man!" 

. 

Blair mournfully reflects. 

**BLAIR:**

"Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide, you know that I'm Relatively young. Please, take your time? Up to this minute, I've thought of myself, And not of his mental health. 

Dear Wolfie, see that he's gentle,  
Remember, you are also a Guide.  
It's not that I'm sentimental --  
It's just that I'm terrified! 

Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide, plan me no plans. I'm in no rush. The whole idea stunk.  
Playing with Spirits a guy can get drunk -- So, sense me no sense, dis me no diss,  
Find me no find, unless you fill my lack: A throwback I won't throw back! 

_Lights down._

* * *

End Spirit Guide, Spirit Guide by Jantique: Jantique1020@hotmail.com

Author and story notes above.

  
Disclaimer: _The Sentinel_ is owned etc. by Pet Fly, Inc. These pages and the stories on them are not meant to infringe on, nor are they endorsed by, Pet Fly, Inc. and Paramount. 


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